former humor columnist class of 2016
Abby Breitfeld is currently in her last year at Durham Academy. She enjoys running cross-country and track, which might come as a surprise to all who know her due to her constant sarcastic comments on the subject. Abby spends her free time either worrying about things she could be working on instead, hidden in her room on her laptop, or spending time with friends. She has a variety of interests, including Harry Potter, ice skating, the void of space, cats, dogs, and Buzzfeed videos, all of which (with the exception of ice skating) have a tendency to keep her awake past midnight. Her biggest pet peeve is when people say “on accident” instead of “by accident,” because no one would ever say “by purpose” and yet “on accident” is apparently completely acceptable. She is glad, however, that she is not as much of a grammar Nazi as Mr. Biersach, as that is no way to live. If Abby had to pick a favorite class at school, she would say it was either European history or math, only because she couldn’t say that it was her free period. Abby dreams that one day she will finally know what she is doing with her life, settle down in a nice house with lots of plants, a few (hypoallergenic) dogs and/or cats, and a red front door.